87 Comments
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Sarah's avatar

Funny you wrote this today, I went to the fair yesterday and the entire population looks like absolute trash. Complete and utter trash.

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James R. R.'s avatar

Everyone looks like a carny now.

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Jacob's avatar

I noticed a couple typos in this piece, and it can only be due to second hand heavy metal poisoning from accidentally shaking hands with a Tattootsie.

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Conundrum Cluster's avatar

I was tired!

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Literally Kane From C&C's avatar

👏🏿HE👏🏿WAS👏🏿TIIIIREEED👏🏿

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Belte's avatar

Tattoo shedding is real, and I’m tired of being called a conspiracy theorist for saying it.

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Walrus Aurelius's avatar

Tattootsies come from Tattooine. What we think is a phenomenon of bad taste is actually just an alien invasion in disguise. Wake up Sheeple

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SamizBOT's avatar

things that are uncomfortable for people and especially politicians to talk about but that obviously need to be greatly restricted: weed, porn, gambling, tattoos. Also, alcohol should not be sold in literally every store and gas station in certain states like CA. We also need a SEVERE crackdown on littering and noise pollution. Dress codes should also be far more common than they are

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Belte's avatar

My state recently introduced alcohol sales in grocery stores (while they used to be restricted to beer or wine and spirit stores). Now, my friends in my men's Bible study who are recovering alcoholics can't just avoid the wine and spirit stores. Instead, they are confronted with the drinks that ruined their lives for years as soon as they walk into get some groceries each week. It's a policy that was clearly pushed by lobbyists without regard to the social collateral damage. Par for the course.

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SamizBOT's avatar

I'm an unapologetic frequent drinker, so I'm not saying this from a position of prudishness, it's just honestly insane that in CA where I live every corner store, gas station, grocery store, pharmacy, etc. sells not only beer and wine but also hard liquor.

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Dave's avatar

The most disturbing trend for me is the increasing amount of people i run into with facial tattooos, just like scribbles and shit on the forehead, above the eyes, and on the upper neck. It was not like this when i was a child in the early 2000s. Something especially grotesque to mar your own face.

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Belte's avatar

Young guy at my church recently converted, and he is steadily removing his tattoos starting with his face. Still has several ones on the face and neck along with full sleeves. But yeah, it’s pretty shocking the before and after already. It’s like the demons are literally and figuratively leaving his body.

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Belte's avatar

Unvaxxed. Untatted. Unmoisturized.

I like your theory of tattoos being the Broken Windows of a person’s social attitudes and behavior. It’s baby’s first step to being an obnoxious, demanding, loud person. They’re daring people to call them out on this act. Tattoos clearly are graffiti for your skin which then people have to see daily just as the graffiti in cities created constant eye sources. One last item would be to ban certain areas of tattoos or to hold the tattooist liable for any health problems that arise from them. I’m thinking face, neck and wrist tattoos. I read an article, probably just a meme, that said top athletes have been recorded as dropping in performance after getting a large or series of tattoos. It might be biological result or the attitude of the bell with everyone else I’m doing what I want to do that translates to worse performance.

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Craftsman Redux's avatar

"Graffiti for your skin" - I like this turn of phrase and the analogy. Will be stealing it.

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Westy's avatar

There's a reason why Tom Brady and Michael Jordan don't have tatts

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John Carpenter's avatar

Tattoos are just permanently dying your hair blue. Kids screaming into the void to get the attention they never got from their parents.

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Eric Brancard's avatar

Policy proposal endorsed.

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Salvador Garza's avatar

Prisoners could also benefit from this program. You could train trusted and well behaved prisoners how to remove tattoos. They could be the manpower for prison clinics who work every day removing tattoos from prisoners.

They would basically have a guaranteed job waiting for them after serving their sentences.

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Kaka4kookoopuffs's avatar

I think the argument of higher scrutiny and regulation on foreign manufacturers holds true for the vast majority products that can enter the human body. The pandemic still left this glaring hole that pharma, food, supplements, etc. all need to be restored for national security.

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Belte's avatar

I think in part a lot of allergies are springing up because we are importing food/spices from abroad that are either rotten or contaminated to add bulk. For instance, a lot of kids now have cinnamon allergies when that was very seldom before and look that up to see the countries of origin. Yikes!

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Kaka4kookoopuffs's avatar

A lot of people and things gotta go man

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Craftsman Redux's avatar

I think that you're absolutely right, and your post reminds me of George W. Bush's "compassionate conservatism" from the 2000 election (which was quickly jettisoned as a priority with the War on Terror). I really do think that there's a there there, and this is one way of improving people's lives.

I need to look into the crowdfunding websites to see if "tattoo removal" is a thing, and if so, to start kicking in some of my own money to make this happen.

Public interest will lead to public policy.

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Craftsman Redux's avatar

So, doing a quick search through GiveSendGo, I came across this post:

https://www.givesendgo.com/redinkallergyrelief

Really heart wrenching, and deals with many of the issues that MG brought up in his post: poor quality ink, unqualified artist, etc.

I'm going to donate $100 and suggest that she move to becoming a Paid Subscriber to the Conundrum Cluster substack.

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Belte's avatar

Conservatives are naturally more compassionate in their actual charity giving (research by Pew bares this out) and daily lives. It's just that we don't shout the "right" slogans about compassion, caring, and kindness toward minorities (while actually giving charities that help those same minorities). W really set us back far in conveying that message.

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Belte's avatar

I think Vance, with his personal background, will be an excellent vehicle for advancing the true message that conservatives care both with their money but also in their expectations. They want high standards and for everyone to live up to those standards as a society, so we don't all collapse to SF street levels.

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Eric Brancard's avatar

I need to submit the “Stop drawing on yourself you dumb bitch” tweet from earlier today to the Mystery Grove Archivist.

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Swagaman's avatar

Great article. I was just talking about this after looking at a bunch of photos of wanted petty criminals and almost all of them had horrible and very visible identifying tattoos. A great boon for catching these guys when paired with a small reward. Let’s create stigma on Tattoos and end the stigma on Androgenic Anabolic Steroids. Gynocracy wants them allowed only for the old broken man and the pshyco lady who lops off her tits or whatever. We need more studies so we can become healthier and more beautiful. To be healthy and beautiful is to be good and pure. To be Good and Pure is to be Godly.

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Eric Brancard's avatar

Agreed. The Trump admin should be providing all supporters with free TRT, HCG and nandrolone.

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Francesco Totti's avatar

Of course this is posted just when I scheduled my first tattoo appointment

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Literally Kane From C&C's avatar

Don’t do it, you have too much to live for!

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Rozko's avatar

I miss when a tattoo meant you were in the military or a biker. If you get a face/neck tattoo and are unwilling to take a padlock at the end of a handkerchief to a man's face for being disrespectful, you should have them shaved off.

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Tom Wall's avatar

As a dad of young kids, what really gets me is how it seems that most other parents my age have tattoos, regardless of if you’re at a public swimming pool or at a fancy restaurant

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Nameless Ghoul's avatar

Im unfortunately a tatted person. I got two tattoos many years ago when I was still dating my high school sweetheart who herself got tattoos under the encouragement of her tattooed, cocaine, and alcohol addicted freak friends. Since leaving me she continued to get more tattoos, as well as a DUI and have had 30 different boyfriends since, and has been struggling to keep a job or pay her bills. I even just discovered she's now dating yet a another guy who is heavily tattooed, fat, jobless alcoholic with neon dyed hair. She never seemed like the kind of person that would have this happen to her, she was always the sweet, pretty, shy girl. I dont say these things to shit on her, in fact I just feel bad for her and pray for her to turn her life around every night.

I know im making the social faux pa of talking online about my retarded faggot incel chud life. But I feel like it just adds to the point MG is making here. And I have no qualms about the prestigious Conundrum Custer community criticizing me. I never thought to remove my tattoos, ive always accepted them as harsh reminders of what bad decisions im capable of. But I suppose if the removals were free, I would consider it. Thank you for the article.

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Belte's avatar

It’s all good, man. I’m glad you got away from that girl. Dodged a bullet there. I do find that the tattoo situation can rapidly escalate, especially for women. They go from a “cute” little ankle tattoo to a sleeve to full body stuff sometimes in a matter of months.

Did you feel any reaction to your tattoo? I’ve heard they can be really itchy as the skin tries to recover unsuccessfully. If Team Trump sent a Tattoo Removal Unit to your place would you answer the call and remove the tattoos or wear them as a mark of Cain?

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Nameless Ghoul's avatar

I got them over 10 years ago, so I dont remember much to be honest. There was some itching, didnt think much of it at the time since it was dismissed as "overworked skin". Where a tattoo "artist" runs the needle gun over a particular part of the skin too much, and a deeper scar appears. It's whole another problem that adds to the point, because this thing is usually dismissed as an unintentional mistake, but still considered an acceptable one for whatever reason. If these guys were even slightly regulated well, overworking the skin should get any kind of license revoked. Anyways everything did heal properly eventually and I have not suffered any other adverse effects. I guess I might be lucky considering the horror stories im just now hearing of.

I would definitely answer Team Trump's call for removal, I couldn't help but only see it as a sign from God to right the wrong.

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